What is AI therapy? How to talk to AI for best outcomes?
Read More
English
Facing cheating in a relationship is undoubtedly one of life’s toughest challenges, and most people may encounter this at some point. What causes infidelity, and what signs indicate that your partner may be at risk? Understanding these can help us handle the crisis and prevent similar issues in the future. In the case of cheating in a relationship, psychology also offers ways to cope.
Cheating in a relationship is often linked to unmet emotional needs. In love psychology, the “Triangular Theory of Love” (Sternberg & Sternberg, 1988) explains that love consists of three basic components:
This refers to a strong attraction, not only physically but also emotionally. Passion is common in the early stages of a relationship or in one-night stands, but it’s hard to sustain a relationship solely on passion.
This goes beyond physical touch and involves deep understanding of the other person’s inner world, preferences, and character. Intimacy can exist not only between lovers but also friends.
In long-term relationships, commitment is the mutual decision to maintain the relationship. In marriage, partners promise to stick together through hardships, whether rich or poor, healthy or ill.
An ideal relationship would have all three elements, but reaching this state is difficult, and dissatisfaction in a relationship can sometimes lead to infidelity.
Psychologists found that over time, the elements of the “love triangle” model can change. For instance, passion typically peaks early in the relationship and declines afterward. However, intimacy and commitment often strengthen over time. Long-term couples may lose their initial passion but still maintain strong intimacy and commitment.
This suggests that after two or three years, a relationship may still have commitment and intimacy, but if one feels a lack of passion, they might seek infidelity. Similarly, if passion is strong but communication is lacking, cheating in a relationship may occur due to insufficient intimacy or commitment.
In short, the “Triangular Theory of Love” can help assess whether a relationship is balanced. If one element is missing, it’s important to consider how to address it to prevent cheating in a relationship or infidelity from happening.
According to the “Big Five Personality Traits” theory (McCrae & Costa, 2008), people with low conscientiousness are more likely to engage in cheating in a relationship (McKibbin et al., 2014). Those with high conscientiousness are more aware of social norms and personal responsibilities. They tend to respect these norms, work to maintain stable relationships, and have stronger self-control, making them less likely to commit infidelity.
Another factor in the Big Five is agreeableness. People with high agreeableness are usually more understanding and empathetic towards their partners. They resolve conflicts through discussion rather than confrontation. On the other hand, individuals with low agreeableness may ignore their partner’s feelings and needs, which can increase the likelihood of infidelity (McKibbin et al., 2014).
Partners who avoid dealing with issues are at a higher risk of cheating in a relationship. When someone avoids addressing dissatisfaction or conflict in the relationship, problems persist or worsen. This can push them to seek a new partner to fulfil unmet needs, leading to infidelity.
By understanding these personality traits, we can better identify behaviors that might lead to cheating in a relationship and take preventive or corrective measures to address these risks.
Coping with infidelity is a significant emotional challenge that requires careful decision-making. People respond to cheating in a relationship differently—some may choose to forgive and work on reconciliation, while others might decide to end the relationship. The core question is: How important is this relationship to you, and can you move past your partner’s infidelity? Below are some ways to manage this difficult situation:
It’s crucial to evaluate whether your partner is truly remorseful and willing to address the root causes of the infidelity. This might involve improving communication, addressing emotional distance, or revisiting shared expectations. If your partner shows a genuine commitment to repairing the relationship, it could be a foundation for rebuilding trust after the cheating in a relationship.
Equally important is self-reflection. Ask yourself: Am I prepared to let go of the past and reinvest in this relationship? Can I move past the infidelity and continue with my partner? Your answers will guide your decision on whether to stay or leave.
If both partners decide to work through the aftermath of cheating in a relationship, seeking professional counselling could be beneficial. Counselling can provide the tools and strategies necessary to help both individuals understand each other’s needs, improve communication, and rebuild a healthier relationship after infidelity.
Facing relationship problems, especially infidelity, can cause emotional distress. In such situations, building emotional resilience becomes crucial. MindForest, a psychology-based AI app, offers various tools and strategies to help you navigate through difficult times.
1) Strengthen Resilience with Psychological Techniques: Dealing with the impact of cheating in a relationship can be overwhelming. MindForest offers interactive courses grounded in psychology to help you manage stress and build emotional resilience. These courses stabilise your emotions, allowing you to think more clearly and promote emotional healing.
2) Personalised Support from AI Coach: MindForest includes a professional AI coach who deeply understands the emotional turmoil caused by relationship issues like cheating. The coach offers emotional support and targeted advice, helping you handle the pain with emotional maturity and restore emotional balance.
3) Insight Journal for Self-Discovery: When facing relationship challenges, recording your emotional journey is essential. MindForest’s Insight Journal allows you to track your feelings and reactions, enhancing self-awareness and helping identify emotional triggers. This helps you handle relationship dynamics more effectively and promotes personal growth.
By using MindForest, you will gain the necessary skills to manage emotional stress effectively and build resilience to overcome relationship difficulties like cheating in a relationship. This not only helps with current relationship problems but also supports your long-term emotional well-being and personal development.
There’s a saying: “Once might be a mistake, but if it happens again, it could be a pattern.” This rings true when handling infidelity. When faced with a partner’s betrayal, it’s important not to rush into trying to save the relationship at the cost of your feelings and dignity. Setting clear boundaries and protecting your self-respect is crucial in such situations. This safeguards your emotional health and honours your self-worth. If there’s a chance of infidelity happening again, you need to carefully consider your stance and future actions to avoid repeating past mistakes, ensuring your long-term happiness and mental well-being.
References
McCrae, R. R., & Costa, P. T., Jr. (2008). The five-factor theory of personality. In O. P. John, R. W. Robins, & L. A. Pervin (Eds.), Handbook of personality: Theory and research (3rd ed., pp. 159–181). The Guilford Press.
McKibbin, W.F., Miner, E.J., Shackelford, T.K., Ehrke, A.D., & Weekes Shackelford, V.A. (2014). Men’s mate retention varies with men’s personality and their partner’s personality. Personality and Individual Differences, 56, 62-67.
Sternberg, R. J., & Sternberg, R. H. (1988).Triangle Of Love. Basic Books.
