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In today’s world, adulting isn’t just about paying bills, but also about handling life’s challenges as an emotionally mature person. Imagine this: you’re at work, facing a tight deadline, and a coworker makes a last-minute mistake. Instead of reacting with frustration, you stay calm, offer a solution, and keep things moving forward—this is where being a mature adult truly shines. In this article, we’ll explore three signs of a mature person in psychology, helping you navigate the complexities of adulting with confidence and emotional strength.
Empathy in psychology refers to the ability to understand and share the feelings of others (Cuff et al., 2016), and it’s closely related to two key concepts: theory of mind and perspective-taking. Theory of mind is the capacity to recognise that other people have their thoughts, emotions, and beliefs, which may differ from ours (Premack & Woodruff, 1978; Doherty, 2009). A classic experiment demonstrates this: if a child is told a story where a character hides candy in one box, but someone moves it to another box without the character’s knowledge, younger children often think the character will look in the new box (Wimmer & Perner, 1983). This shows they haven’t yet developed the ability to see things from the character’s perspective. As a theory of mind develops, usually around the age of five, we become better at perspective-taking, which is the ability to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes and understand their viewpoint or emotional state (Davis et al., 1966). This skill is key to being mature and forms the foundation of empathy.
Empathy is a clear sign of a mature person because it requires the emotional strength to step outside our own experience and embrace another’s perspective. A mature individual approaches social situations with sensitivity, making them better communicators and more emotionally intelligent. In adulting, having empathy allows us to manage relationships, resolve conflicts, and create deeper connections.
To become more empathetic, we can practise perspective-taking by actively listening to others without judgment, imagining ourselves in their position, and being mindful of their emotions. In adulting, engaging in diverse conversations, and reflecting on our biases can help us develop empathy, fostering a more mature mentality in life.
Self-awareness is the ability to recognise and understand your own strengths, weaknesses, and the roles you play within social settings (Sutton, 2016). It involves knowing your responsibilities and understanding how your actions affect others. Self-awareness is closely linked to self-control (Alberts et al., 2011), as it requires not only understanding your position in social and professional relationships but also the ability to act in ways that align with the expectations of those around you. In the workplace, a self-aware person knows when to contribute ideas and when to step back, recognising the boundaries of their role—a key aspect of adulting.
Self-awareness is a sign of maturity because it shows that a person is in touch with reality and understands how their behaviour fits into the larger social or organisational context. A mature individual can control their impulses and act appropriately in different situations. In contrast, a person lacking self-awareness may speak or behave in socially inappropriate ways, revealing a gap in understanding of their role. Adulting requires both self-awareness and the ability to adjust behaviour to meet social norms, demonstrating emotional intelligence and maturity.
To increase self-awareness and improve in adulting, one can reflect on past experiences, seek feedback from colleagues or friends, and regularly assess how their actions affect others. Mindfulness practices can also help in becoming more aware of one’s thoughts and emotions, leading to better self-control. Over time, this practice of self-reflection fosters a deeper understanding of oneself, resulting in more mature and appropriate behaviour in various situations.
Resilience in psychology refers to the ability to adapt and bounce back from adversity, stress, or difficult life events (Southwick et al., 2014). It’s not about avoiding hardships but developing the strength to endure them and grow from the experience. Adulting involves resilience, as it is built through emotional, mental, and social factors that help individuals cope with challenges. It involves flexibility in thinking, maintaining optimism, and using coping strategies that enable us to overcome obstacles without losing hope or purpose.
Resilience is a sign of maturity because it reflects the ability to face life’s inevitable struggles with emotional stability and determination. Adulting means understanding that setbacks are part of life and doesn’t let failures define them. Instead, they use challenges as opportunities to grow and develop. Being mature also comes with the understanding that resilience requires persistence and maintaining a sense of purpose, essential for overcoming life’s hardships in adulting.
To build resilience, one must have a strong sense of purpose in life. Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor and psychologist, believed that having meaning is essential for enduring suffering (Frankl, 1992). He quoted Nietzsche: “He who has a why to live can almost bear any how,” underscoring the importance of purpose in resilience. Historical figures like Nelson Mandela exemplify this. Mandela’s resilience during 27 years of imprisonment was fueled by his unshakable belief in justice and equality. To increase resilience and be more mature, we can foster a meaningful life by setting long-term goals, reflecting on our purpose, and remaining optimistic even in difficult times.
In the journey of personal growth, becoming more mature in adulting is essential. MindForest is your digital ally in cultivating this maturity. Explore the transformative features of MindForest:
1) AI Coach for Guidance on Empathy: Engage in meaningful dialogues with an AI coach who can help you develop empathy by analysing your interpersonal relationships. The coach guides you in perspective-taking, offering advice to enhance your understanding and interactions with others.
2) Insight Journal for Self-Awareness: MindForest includes insight journal feature that encourages self-awareness by recording your thoughts, strengths, and weaknesses in daily life. This reflection helps you understand your personal growth and areas for improvement.
3) Interactive Psychology Course about Resilience: MindForest offers engaging courses, including one on resilience, to help you develop the skills needed to navigate adulting challenges. These courses provide practical insights and strategies to build resilience and maturity.
Download MindForest now to cultivate the maturity and resilience needed to succeed in adulting and redefine your personal growth.
References
Alberts, H. J. E. M., Martijn, C., & de Vries, N. K. (2011). Fighting self-control failure: overcoming ego depletion by increasing self-awareness. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 47(1), 58-62. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jesp.2010.08.004
Cuff, B. M. P., Brown, S. J., Taylor, L., & Howat, D. J. (2016). Empathy: A Review of the Concept. Emotion Review, 8(2), 144-153. https://doi.org/10.1177/1754073914558466
Davis, M. H., Conklin, L., Smith, A., & Luce, C. (1996). Effect of perspective taking on the cognitive representation of persons: a merging of self and other. Journal of personality and social psychology, 70(4), 713–726. https://doi.org/10.1037//0022-3514.70.4.713
Doherty, M. J. (2009). Theory of mind: How children understand others' thoughts and feelings. Psychology Press.
Frankl, V. E. (1992). Man's search for meaning: An introduction to logotherapy (4th ed.) (I. Lasch, Trans.). Beacon Press.
Premack, D., & Woodruff, G. (1978). Does the chimpanzee have a theory of mind?. Behavioral and brain sciences, 1(4), 515-526.
Southwick, S. M., Bonanno, G. A., Masten, A. S., Panter-Brick, C., & Yehuda, R. (2014). Resilience definitions, theory, and challenges: interdisciplinary perspectives. European Journal of Psychotraumatology, 5(1). https://doi.org/10.3402/ejpt.v5.25338
Sutton A. (2016). Measuring the Effects of Self-Awareness: Construction of the Self-Awareness Outcomes Questionnaire. Europe's journal of psychology, 12(4), 645–658. https://doi.org/10.5964/ejop.v12i4.1178
Wimmer, H., & Perner, J. (1983). Beliefs about beliefs: representation and constraining function of wrong beliefs in young children's understanding of deception.
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